Down to the Wanting
a Firefly story
by dirty diana

 Hugs to sffan for the rocking beta.

Translations: tianna=oh God

Jayne knew he was in trouble before they even left the ship. They were standing on the gangplank, getting ready to take a trip into town, everyone except Inara who was off on business, and Book who had volunteered to look after River. Simon wouldn't be leaving his sister for an entire evening unless something was on his mind. Jayne should have known that. Should have stayed in.

It started with the staring.

"Whatcha lookin' at?" Jayne growled.

Simon shrugged placidly. "Nothing."

That's how Mal found them, engaged in a blinking contest in the mouth of the cargo bay. He raised his eyebrows, looking at Simon. "You gonna make me regret letting you out for the night, doc?"

Simon's gaze shifted for a moment, that same blue-eyed intensity suddenly focused on the captain. And Jayne didn't know if he liked that, liked having Simon stare at Mal like he could swallow him whole. Not that he liked it any more when...

Anyway. He knew he was in trouble.


The town isn't big, but it is bigger than most of the towns they'd been to recently, and it has a movie theatre. Not vids, but real movies, with a rattling projector rolling the film reels in the back. Zoe wanted to go, so Wash took her. Kaylee wanted to go too, but wasn't going without Mal. And the captain still hasn't learned to say no to Kaylee, no matter how good he is at with everyone else. So that's how Jayne and Simon ended up in the bar by themselves, sitting in a booth drinking pints of the local beer.

"Simon, what are you doing?"

"I'm not doing anything," Simon answers quietly. But it's a reply belied by the steady pressure of his hand on Jayne's right thigh. Soft, but firm, stroking and seeking.

"Simon," Jayne growls, "remove your hand before I remove it for ya."

Simon isn't looking at him. He's looking out around the bar and sipping his drink, like he hasn't heard a word.

Jayne glances down at his lap, at Simon's hand in his lap. Considers the smooth china skin, calculates how much force it would take to crush those fine bones with one blow. He wonders if Simon really knows what he's getting himself into.

"Simon, I ain't...I don't much care what a man likes to do. Ain't none of my business. But I ain't...I've never done this."

This attracts Simon's stare, one raised sceptical eyebrow. "Never?"

"Well..." Shit. "Not recently."

Simon smiles gently. "I haven't done this recently either."

He's twisting the words again, Jayne hates when he does that. "That ain't my meaning. Last time I done this, you were...I don't even wanna think about how old you woulda been the last time I done this."

Simon frowns at him. "How old are you, Jayne?"


"Hmmn." Simon's mouth forms a straight line, so that Jayne can't tell his reaction. "You don't look it."

"S'pose. How old are you?"

Underneath the table, Simon's hand has found its real target. The touch of his fingers on Jayne's cock, through the rough cotton of his pants, is practised and gentle. "Is that what you want to talk about?"

There are too many thoughts in Jayne's brain right now, more than he generally likes, and he closes his eyes to try to focus. Simon is a pretty man. Jayne's noticed, he would have to have been dead not to. But he's dangerous, Jayne knows that, him and his crazy sister. And Mal...

Jayne opens his eyes, having found a thought that he thinks will help. "Mal'll kill me."

"If he finds out," Simon agrees. "Who's going to tell him?"

"No one ever needs to tell Mal anything," Jayne protests. "He'll find out." Like he found out about Ariel. There's a thought, there's a revelation that will get Simon's hand off his cock in a hurry.

Suddenly he's not sure if that's what he wants. He knows that this isn't right, but he's losing track of why.

"We can't...not here."

Simon gestures across the room, to a nasty argument heating up at the bar. "No one's looking at us. No one will notice. Adding as an afterthought, "unless you scream," Jayne's cock throbbing so hard that it's seeming like an option.

But Jayne's been in a lot of outerworld bars, enough to know what kind of things can happen when you're not paying attention. He shakes his head. "Not. Here."

Simon looks at him, sees he means it. "Let's go."

Jayne swallows his drink and follows Simon out of the bar.


It's not that far back to the ship, but it's a longer trip than Jayne likes. He's burning up by the time they get there, grabs hold of Simon and pushes him against the wall of his bunk before the door is even fully closed.

Simon laughs and reaches up to kiss him, but Jayne pulls away. The doctor's eyes fold into amused slits of light. "You were serious about that."


"About not kissing. You were serious. I thought you were joking."

Jayne shrugs, wonders why they're talking so much. "I just don't see the point is all."

"Then you've never been kissed properly." And he grabs a fistful of Jayne's hair so that he can't escape, and slowly, deliberately, licks Jayne's lips. Then he presses his mouth against Jayne's own.

It's a kiss without finesse, and Jayne knows enough about Simon to suspect that's by choice. The doctor's tongue thrusts deep inside his mouth, claiming ownership, finding a rhythm so vicious that Jayne can't breathe.

He's gasping hard by the time he's released, his cock hard again inside his pants. Simon's hands are already moving south, undoing Jayne's belt. "Not bad?" he asks.

"Not bad," Jayne agrees.

"Tell me," Simon whispers, and Jayne should have known he'd be a talker, but it's not so bad, the low sound of Simon's voice in his ear, and Simon's breath hot on his neck. "Tell me what else you want. Tell me what else I can show you."

"Inside you," Jayne groans gently, thrusting with his hips, into Simon's hands. "I want to come inside you."

"Jayne," he's laughing with his eyes again, "I don't fuck on the first date. That's my only rule."

And Simon kneels down, stroking Jayne's cock with one hand and licking him gently. But Jayne's tired of being teased, grabs Simon's head with both hands and forces his cock inside the wetness of his mouth. Simon takes him in easily, begins to suck, his tongue making movements up and down Jayne's thick shaft.

Jayne's pumping hard now, fucking Simon's soft mouth, feels himself on the verge, and Simon feels it too, cause he pulls his head back, and Jayne's watching himself climax, cock convulsing, shooting come all over the doctor's pretty, swollen mouth with a groan. 

"Tianna," Jayne says to no-one in particular, and drops to his knees, lets Simon kiss him, tastes Simon's wet salty tongue in his mouth, tastes his own come on Simon's lips. Simon is laughing.

"Not bad?"

"Not bad."

"Jayne," Simon says softly, "do you want to touch me?" 

The answer is yes. He's just become aware of the pressure of the doctor's body on his, a form he can already tell is more muscular than it looks inside starched shirts. He can feel Simon pressing into him, and the shape of Simon's hardon against his thigh. He peels off the doctor's expensive shirt and throws it aside.

The skin on Jayne's hands is calloused and rough, but his fingers are steady and confident. Slowly he explores the skin of Simon's torso, the way his pale skin flushes when he presses too hard, the way Simon's breathing increases when his fingers pass over round, pink nipples.

Testing, he bends his head, circles the nipples with his tongue, feels them turn hard in his mouth. A shudder ripples through the other man, and Jayne chuckles. "You like that?"

"A lot. Don't stop."

Jayne lays Simon flat on the floor of his quarters, unbuttons his pants and pulls them off. He's never met anyone this sensitive to touch, watches half-amused and half-amazed as Simon arches his back, under the touch of Jayne's hand on his bare hip. He strokes the soft skin of Simon's belly, licks the inside of his thigh, each movement earning a different kind of moan, like a conductor in a symphony. 

He continues till Simon's skin is a blotchy pink all over, bright red in some spots that Jayne knows are going to be bruises later. Then he pulls his head up to meet Simon's bright eyes, checking for instructions. Simon's tongue touches his upper lip, almost a smile.

"I want to kiss you."

Jayne obeys. He shifts his body till he's covering the doctor, pushes his tongue into Simon's mouth, and with the other hand reaches down to grab hold of Simon's cock, rock hard and spilling wetness at the tip. The doctor moans, arches his back. Jayne speeds up the rhythm of his hand, matches it to the rhythm of his tongue, faster and faster. Simon jerks sharply, and comes hard and wet in Jayne's hand.


Simon pulls his naked body onto his bed, and watches as Jayne gets dressed. Neither of them thinks of him staying. 

Jayne's watching Simon too, something on his mind. "You said not on the first date."

Simon's mouth curves into a smile. "I know."

"Does that mean...maybe some other time?"

"Maybe. It depends."

"On what?" It's one thing to have rules, Jayne thinks, but entirely another to not know what they are.

"Different things. I..." Simon dips his head slightly, suddenly shy. "We probably won't get to do this that often, Jayne."

"Well, that's fair enough." Jayne hits the control on the door to Simon's bunk, ready to leave. "Captain catches us, he'll space me for sure."